How To Make Friends As An Adult

Venice, CA

Happy Monday!  I wanted to kick off summer – and my Summer Wellness Series with a post that I’ve been wanting to write for a long time!  I never realized how much interest surrounded this topic until I moved from NYC to LA a year and a half ago.  So many of you asked me for tips on making friends in a new city and how to make friends as an adult in general – and I really wanted to delve into this topic today.  I’ll be including personal stories and scenarios that worked for me and things I’ve learned along the way!

I’m so excited to be giving away something fabulous every-single-week this summer as a part of my Wellness Series!  This week’s giveaway is Rachel Zoe’s Summer Box of Style (as seen in my unboxing video) featuring a straw summer tote, For Love & Lemons fringe earrings, white kaftan, and Kate Somerville exfoliate glow moisturizer (a $350 value.)  To enter this giveaway; Subscribe to my Youtube channel, Subscribe to my newsletter, Follow me on Instagram, and leave me a comment below.  Giveaway is worldwide and winner will be announced on Friday!

  1.  Find a gym, class or private workout studio that you enjoy going to and become a regular
    One of my best friends in NYC happened to be my pilates teacher.  I was living in the West Village and became interested in taking private pilates classes so I googled “West Village pilates” and her studio was one of the first to pop up.  I scheduled a private session with her and we instantly hit it off and 3 years later – we’ve taken several trips together, had so many laughs, shed so many tears, and she was the person who inspired me to start meditating.
  2. Join Junior League, Boys and Girls club or another charity organization
    My mom was a member of Junior League for years when she first moved from Connecticut to Arizona.  She felt so alone and out of her element moving from the east coast to the west coast, and the Junior League was a safe, fun place for her to interact with like minded women.  Some of her closest friends to this day – almost 30 years later are from her charity days.
  3. Get a dog!  And take it everywhere with you; dog parks, coffee shops, to run errands
    Seriously, I have met SO many people through Charlie.  It’s honestly insane.  It’s even how I met my boyfriend of almost 9 months!
  4. Sign up for a seminar, class, or attend a conference about a topic you’re interested in
    Ever wanted to learn how to speak a new language?  It’s the perfect time!  You’ll have tons of potential study buddies all around you – and what a great way to break the ice!  Interested in brushing up on your social media, marketing, or graphic design skills?  Your new best friend may have had the same idea and you can be beginners together!
  5. Go on a solo retreat
    I’ve been on two solo retreats and made best friends on each one.   One was a week long health/spa retreat and one was a yoga/surf retreat called Anamaya in Costa Rica.
  6. Travel alone
    Sounds intimidating or uncomfortable to some (and it did to me for a while!) but read all about my tips on How To Travel Alone here.
  7. Reach out to old friends from your hometown, middle school, high school, or college that now live in the same city as you via Facebook
    When I moved to Venice, I didn’t know ANYONE – or at least that’s what I thought.  I had about 4 friends/family total in all of Los Angeles…but then I quickly did a search on Facebook and realized that tons of my friends from my hometown, middle school, high school, AND college had moved to Venice or the surrounding neighborhoods!  I decided to have a huge Memorial Day BBQ at my place last year and invited all of them via Facebook and was so happy to see familiar faces show up.  I was able to rekindle bonds I had back in the day, that had faded due to distance/me living in NYC, and loved knowing I had a community of genuine women around me from back home.  Don’t be shy to take the first step/make the first move in inviting people somewhere or suggesting plans!!!!!
  8. Through friends of friends
    If you’re new to a city, or even if you’re not new, and looking to making more friends, new friends or stronger friendships – then branch out – get out of your comfort zone!  Go to that birthday party you got invited to but probably would have skipped in the past, organize a group of girlfriends for a picnic at the beach or in Central Park, a brunch or fun dinner/girls night out, and tell everyone to bring one of their friends you don’t already know, attend that event you were on the fence about with a neighbor, colleague or cousin, and grab happy hour with your colleagues!
  9. At work
    Don’t be shy or afraid to reach out to new or even old coworkers!  Start small if you’re hesitant – ask someone you don’t know that well to grab coffee on break, try a new lunch spot, or just break the ice by asking for their advice or opinion on something (maybe it’s fun things to do in your area on the weekend, great dinner spots, or something work related.)  People love when you ask them for advice or their opinion – it makes them feel good, wanted, and needed!  Most people are happy that you asked and honestly just want to connect just as much as you do!!!!
  10. Social media
    My sweet photographer Jessica Alexander who takes most of the pictures for my blog (and is in the photos above with me!) has become one of my closest friends in LA.  I found her through Instagram because she was shooting several other bloggers I followed in LA.  I needed a photographer when I moved here, and I LOVED her work, so I just emailed her asking if she’d be open to meeting for coffee and doing a test shoot.  We met, we instantly hit it off and now we work together/hang out at least 4 times a week.  She even watches Charlie when I’m away and has become an incredibly trustworthy, kind companion in my life.  I have several other similar stories where my videographer and I ended up becoming very close after I discovered her on Instagram and reached out, same thing with my graphic designer, and stylist. If you’re able to find like minded/similar individuals in your industry online – don’t hesitate to send them a DM or email telling them you love their work and would like to meet up for a coffee.  Maybe they won’t turn into a best friend, but they could be a great business connection or contact to have.  You’ll never know if you don’t try :)

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60 Comments

  • Christi says:

    Subscribed to all! 🤞🤞🤞

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Rach says:

    These are great tips! I do agree that making friends as an adult can be so hard. Definitely trying some of your suggestions!

    http://www.rdsobsessions.com

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Petronila Yego says:

    11. Comment on her blog
    A new follower, and I am so grateful I came across your blog. Absolutely not comparable to any I have read before
    with love from Kenya, Africa

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Jae says:

    Such a cute inspiring post! I haven’t traveled alone much but it sure is a rewarding and freeing feeling!
    Jae
    http://www.allthatjae.com

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Keyondria says:

    I’ve always loved reading your blog and now that you’ve started posting vlogs on youtube it has formed a better connection that we wouldn’t have otherwise. Subscribed to all! Would enjoy trying the Kate Somerville exfoliate glow moisturizer.

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Keyondria says:

    I’ve always loved reading your blog and now that you’ve started posting vlogs on youtube it has formed a better connection that we wouldn’t have otherwise. Subscribed to all! Would enjoy trying the Kate Somerville exfoliate glow moisturizer.

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Ashley says:

    Hi Kat! I’m subscribed to all of your social media accounts. You’re one of my most favorite bloggers and I always look forward to seeing your posts!

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Shree Patel says:

    Thanks for the advice! It’s definately been hard to find friends with similar interests after college and I will try these out

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Roses for Fridays | by mia says:
    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Nadya says:

    Great post, Kat! Another great way to meet new friends is by going back to school! I didnt know a soul when I moved to LA. I went back to school for my MBA and that’s how I met most of my now close friends!

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Vish says:

    Hi Kat! Have been loving your videos and posts lately. Super inspiring 😍 I’m not subscribed to all!!

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Jessica says:

    Subscribed to all! Great post!

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Audra Davis says:

    Love these suggestions! I almost moved to a new city with no friends, and some of these worked for me too!

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Catlin says:

    Such a great blog post! Thank you so much for taking the time to write this and all the great content you share!

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Raina Birden says:

    Thank you for the great suggestions on how to meet other women. It sounds like you have made some amazing friends. I love your blog and Instagram posts. Thanks for being so inspiring to us women.

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Catlin N says:

    This is a wonderful blog post! Thank you so much for sharing this and all of your great content!

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Laura says:

    Subscribed to all :) I love this entire post, I’m 33 and I find it so hard to make friends as an adult. Especially since I don’t have (and are not planning on having) kids. Thanks for the tips!

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Caroline berzak says:

    Signed up! Xx

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Romina says:

    Kat! I loved this post. It’s all about getting out of your comfort zone (which can be hard) but that’s the only way to meet new people. I met new people last summer through volunteering and made some great friends i was even invited to a wedding and made a custom painting for the bride and groom!

    I love your Instagram page too, you’re like a ray of sunshine ☀️

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Jenna D’Amico says:

    I would love to win this giveaway!! Love Rachel Zoe! Also, this is amazing advice! It’s definitely a lot tougher making friends as an adult in a new city. I had the same troubles when I moved from Connecticut to Nashville. Wish I had this advice then!! Thanks for sharing :)

    Xox
    Jenna
    http://www.jennaleeann.com

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Kaori says:

    Entered👍
    It takes long time for me to make new friends these are good tips!

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Alejandra says:

    I shared this tips with my newly single friend :)

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Tricia Monahan says:

    Love this read Kat!! Love your entire vibe and style! I already follow you and Charlie on Instagram, you are my favorite! I love your newsletter too. I just signed up for you on YouTube. Fingers crossed I win. I love the earrings! Keep decorating the world!! Much love and success too you!!! Oh and PS I don’t like graphic tees on men either!
    Xoxo 💕💕

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Lily says:

    Love the outfits and the pictures! 🍉

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Kimberly says:

    Loved this post! Such good tips, now I just have to book that solo trip

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Thalia says:

    Omg has it been that long since you moved to Venice! I have been following you since NYC, I was sad to see you move and with that lose your insider scoop on NY. These are all great suggestions! Thanks for sharing.

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Leslie says:

    Love your blog and insta! 💕

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Vatana Rosa says:

    Love these tips Kat!! It is harder to make friends when you have kids too–especially when your kids are friends but you do not necessarily want to be friends with their parents lol. I also found volunteering at my boys’ school helped to widen my social circle. And keeping in touch and making an effort with old friends is harder but also worth it:)

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Tricia says:

    Love following you and Charlie on Instagram! I’m now following on all 3. Love this fun giveaway for summer. Your my favorite blogger, love your demeanor, style and overall vibe. Xoxo Tricia
    ps- I vote NO to graphic tees too. 🤣🤣💕💕💕

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Dany Khy says:

    Thanks for sharing Kat! I just moved to New York from D.C. so I can definitely relate. Love all your suggestions! It’s inspiring to know that you’ve picked up and moved without knowing a soul and created this amazing community in no time. :D

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • Narhee says:

    Love this post! so wonderful, and these are great tips for me to consider for life after college!

    Narhee | Made in Mauve

    June 25, 2018 | Reply
  • My lovely people says:

    Thank you dear for this amazing post. I’m going to practice some of them. You look gorgeous as usually.
    New blog post: How to wear a culottes pants. An outfit full of color, perfect for summer.

    Kisses from Miami

    http://mylovelypeople.com/2018/06/26/culottes-pants-love-them-or-hate-them/

    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • May says:

    I think traveling alone is the best way to meet new people. It really forces you to get out there.

    May || http://themoderness.com

    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • Vanita says:

    Nice

    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • Marita says:

    Great post :) You look so lovely together :)

    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • Chelle says:

    I’ve recently had to do some evaluating and soul searching, and ended up needing to shy away from people in my life that weren’t the best for me. I find myself still talking to my core friends, but would love to have a handful of gals (or guys) that I can run to no matter what. Thanks for the post! Great ideas!!

    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • Lori says:

    Great tips, thank you for sharing!

    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • Ewa Macherowska says:
    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • JoAnna Carpentier says:

    As an adult working from home, I know how hard it can be to make friends. Super appreciate these tips! :)

    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • Courtney H says:

    Subscribed to all!

    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • Chelcey says:

    Great post! There is so much truth in this, as I have used just about all of these suggestions when I moved across the country and back. Thank you for both the post and the fun giveaway!!

    June 26, 2018 | Reply
  • Victoria Paulus says:

    Have been reading your blog for over 3 years now. It has been so much fun watching the blog evolve and transform.

    June 27, 2018 | Reply
  • Ellen says:

    I wanted to find new friends when i moved to london and it so hard. I got lucky and found Rosanna(italian) in a facebook group. Even though we did not have much time left to hang out, because i moved back to sweden. We made the most of it. But we connected and i cosider her as one of best friends. So hopefully i am going back to visit her in autum! I now live abroad again and it is hard when you have distance to all your friendships. // swedish girl Ellen Ps, your insta and Charlie is the best

    June 28, 2018 | Reply
  • Sarah M says:

    I love this advice! I’m moving from DC to NYC soon for work and have very few friends in the city so I’ll definitely be following some of these tips. It’s nerve racking, but I think it’s so important to get out of your comfort zone.

    June 28, 2018 | Reply
  • Christine Wong says:

    Apologies if this is a double post! Love your blog and all your content on your YouTube and insta account too! Excited for your secret project too! Subscribed to all 💕🌹

    June 28, 2018 | Reply
  • Bettye Rainwater says:

    Great tips – and what success you’ve had meeting people since your move to LA! You must be a very likable person :-)

    I just read in someone’s comment that you’re doing youtube vlogs now, too…I’ll have to go check them out!

    Bettye

    June 28, 2018 | Reply
  • Pamela says:

    This was such a relatable post! I really needed this. Im a shy and anxious person, which makes it really difficult to meet new people. Love your tips!

    June 29, 2018 | Reply
  • Julie Allen says:

    I have followed
    You for years and have always loved your style and posts. Thanks for doing the fashion searching for me!

    June 29, 2018 | Reply
  • Amy says:

    I definitely need to try some of these now that I’m living full time in my soon-to-be-husband’s hometown. He has all of his highschool and college friends local, plus his family, and I’ve been working remotely which leaves me without my own pack around. These are great tips! Thanks for posting.

    June 29, 2018 | Reply
  • Emily A Rabbitt says:

    Subscribed to all! I am about to make a big move, so this post is very helpful as I definitely want to make more friends in my new city!

    June 29, 2018 | Reply
  • ivana split says:

    amazing tips for making friends as an adult!

    https://modaodaradosti.blogspot.com/

    June 29, 2018 | Reply
  • Sarah says:

    Subscribed to all (was already subscribed to some — love your newsletter)! Now excited to read the rest of your post because I’ve been wanting to look into new ways of putting myself out there for new friends as an adult ❤️

    Sarah

    June 29, 2018 | Reply
  • Karen says:

    Done! And thank you for the opportunity! Have a great weekend.

    June 29, 2018 | Reply
  • Vanessa Wood says:

    I have been a long time follower and admirer of yours. Making friends with other adults is hard, especially when you live in a small town. Your tips are great and so helpful!
    I loved your June unboxing video, and am in awe of all the amazing products you shared (including the links).
    Have a wonderful weekend!
    -Vanessa of Green Acres Meets Paris

    July 1, 2018 | Reply
  • Gillian Vance says:

    I have been following you on bloglovin, but now have also signed up for your newsletter. Having moved to another country 12 years ago I know what it is like to try and make friends. I definitely need to go back to my yoga class, they changed the venue and i thought i would stop going, but i had some budding friendships there.

    July 1, 2018 | Reply
  • Alice says:

    Great tips…I know as we get older, it’s harder to connect with people. Just gotta put ourselves out there!

    July 3, 2018 | Reply
  • On the List says:

    […] especially if you find yourself in a new city and/or job. With Love From Kat shares all about How To Make Friends As An Adult. Also check out her post Weekend […]

    July 7, 2018 | Reply
  • Lisa says:

    Really enjoyed reading this post. Great suggestions. I’m very interested in trying some solo traveling. Thanks!

    July 12, 2018 | Reply
  • ALC Dress & What I am Thankful for in 2018 - With Love From Kat says:

    […] grateful for my best friends.  Some of which I’ve had since Kindergarten, some of which I’ve had since college, and some […]

    November 26, 2018 | Reply
  • How To Be More Confident - With Love From Kat says:

    […] Surround yourself with genuine people.Find your tribe.  Evaluate all of the relationships in your life and make sure you have cultivated a small handful of real, true, honest friends who will have your back whether you are broke AF, injured, sad, unemployed – you name it.  These people will lift you up and recharge you when you’re feeling down.  These people will reassure you when you need it the most and remind you that you are unique, special and beautiful.   […]

    February 24, 2019 | Reply